How I Got My Toddler to Poo in the Potty

By Tamara Reese

We’ve all heard horror stories about potty learning. From ill-timed accidents to elaborate bribes, teaching (“training”) children how to use the potty turns even the most sensible people into frantic angry shut-ins. I bought into the hype reading “three day potty boot camp” books and prepared to sit in the bathroom with my naked kid eating salty foods, drinking water, and letting his Curious George doll pretend to pee on the toilet.

I was tired of changing diapers. Infant diapers are an inevitable part of my day, but huge man-sized turds from my 25lb toddler were driving me insane. His lanky body was awkward and unstable on public changing tables and the smell could clear a room in seconds. My blood boiled as I watched him walk behind the couch, drop a deuce in his diaper and then demand I change it immediately–or rather hiding it from me until his butthole blazed with a fiery red rash that required a teary mid-day shower.

I wanted him to put that shit in the toilet. Literally.

But learning to use the potty is more than being physically able to sit on a toilet; it is a psychological transition that if handled poorly can result in issues spanning from constipation and UTIs to genital anxiety. More so, my son learning to use the potty was not about me, what I was tired of doing, or how and when I wanted him to take control of his body.

It was about him. His body and his desire and willingness to feel and respond to it.

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