Introducing the Kveller God Series

God on Kveller is a huge topic. Like, really huge. Many of us have a hard time figuring out just what we believe about God on our own terms. Throw a 4-year-old in there who demands answers? Yep, even harder.

Or is it? We’re devoting the next month to exploring how parents have talked to their kids about God. We’ll get stories from parents of different religions, from devout believers to atheists and everywhere in between. You’ll see posts from New Yorker editor Ben Greenman, children’s book author Laurel Snyder, a practicing Mormon, the formerly-Catholic half of an interfaith marriage, and many more parents who are currently struggling with what to tell (or not tell) their kids about God.

We’ll be rolling out one post a day on the blog, so check back here to read them all.

Among the articles you'll find are:

• I Tried to Raise a Jew & He Turned Out a Communist
• My Daughter Wants to Know Why I Pray 
• My Sons, The (Maybe) Nonbelievers  

How I Keep My Boys Entertained on Shabbat

By Mayim Bialik

Shabbat is lovely. Shabbat is 25 hours of no phone, no radio, no piano, no driving, no cooking, no TV (which I don’t watch anyway), no pressures of the outside world. You hang out with friends, eat lavish meals, nap, let your kids frolic as you get a “break,” and enjoy the synagogue of your choosing which both enlightens your soul and tantalizes your children. Unless…

Unless you live an hour’s walk from the nearest synagogue and have no friends within walking distance, in which case it’s a 25 hour test of wills: can I keep my kids happy? Entertained? Happy to be Jewish when the day seems like one long list of restrictions?

We sometimes host friends (who drive to our house) but this past Shabbat it was just us. Me and my boys. All day. No plans. Just hanging out. Both boys are fighting a horrendous cough so our usual “Shabbos walk” which takes about an hour was out of the question, as was playing ball and scootering around in the local church’s parking lot.

Here are some of the things we did to pass the glorious Sabbath day. (I try not to perform melakhot (work prohibitions) on Shabbat, so if you have any questions about the halakhic (Jewish law) propriety of any of the following, I suggest you consult with a local Rabbi and not go by my activities as any advocation of what you should or should not do; I’m doing my best and I’m still learning too!)

1. Organize. It’s one of my favorite things to do, and thank you, God, it’s something both of my sons love doing, too. We stack things that need stacking, go through boxes of miscellaneous toys and put things back where they belong. It’s a great way for kids to “rediscover” toys that had been long missing and forgotten, and it usually is good for a nice chunk of time.

Continue reading.
 

Did You Know?

Facts, Figures & Folklore about the Jewish Holiday of Shavuot

Did you know that the word Shavuot means "weeks" in Hebrew?
The name of the holiday refers to the fact that it falls exactly seven weeks, or 49 days, after the Jewish festival of Passover.

Did you know that the holiday of Shavuot commemorates the giving of the Ten Commandments to Moses on Mount Sinai?
This is the seminal event in the formation of the Jewish people.


Did you know that on Shavuot, many Jewish people stay up all night studying Torah?
This all-night vigil is linked to the morning on which the Jewish people received the Torah, when legend teachers that the Israelites overslept. In order to ensure that such a slight never happens again, Jews traditionally stay up all night on the evening of Shavuot, studying the tractates handed down to Moses the following morning.


Did you know that on Shavuot, it is customary to eat only dairy foods?
One possible explanation is related to a verse in the Torah, which says, "And He gave us this land, a land flowing with milk and honey." Cheesecake and blintzes are two traditionally favorites on Shavuot.


Did you know that many Jewish communities read the Book of Ruth during Shavuot services?
Ruth was the first convert to Judaism and reading her story is said to be a parable for wholehearted way in which the Jewish people accepted the Torah.

Lag BaOmer

WHAT IS LAG B’OMER AND WHEN DO WE CELEBRATE IT?

Every Jewish letter has a number value depending on its position in the Hebrew alphabet. The Hebrew word lag is written with the Hebrew letters lamed and gimmel which, together, have a nember value of 33. Thus Lag baOmer means 'the 33rd [day] in the Omer'. This always works out to be on the 18th day of the Hebrew month Iyar.

Lag baOmer is a joyous holiday. On Lag baOmer we remember two important events: the end of a plague of sickness which had killed 24,000 students of the famous Rabbi Akiva and also the death of a brilliant student of Rabbi Akiva's, Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai.

THE STORY OF LAG BAOMER

Over 2,000 years ago an army of Romans invaded Israel and destroyed the second Holy Temple in Jerusalem. The Romans were cruel to the Jewish people and wouldn't let them study or teach the Torah. However, some brave and very clever rabbis refused to obey the Roman rules and taught Torah in secret.

One famous rabbi named Akiva continued to teach his students lessons from the Torah. The Romans heard about Rabbi Akiva and began to look for him. So Akiva thought of a way to protect himself and his students while still teaching Torah.

He told his students to carry bows, arrows and picnic lunches. Then the students should go to the fields. It would look like they were there to hunt, not study with the rabbi. When the Roman soldiers saw the Jews going out to hunt they let them pass. But each day when the students reached the fields Rabbi Akiva met them and they would learn and study together.

WHO WAS RABBI AKIVA?

Before becoming a rabbi, Akiva was a poor shepherd who married a woman named Rachel. She convinced him to study and he became a very learned and well-respected rabbi.

Rabbi Akiva and his students (dressed up as hunters) would go to a cave deep in the woods and there they would study Torah.

WHO WAS RABBI SHIMON BAR YOCHAI?

Continue reading.  

How to Talk to Your Kids About God

Most young children have some concept of God. It is important to respond to their questions with sophistication and honesty.

By Rabbi David Wolpe

Most young children have some concept of God. It is important to respond to their questions with sophistication and honesty.

By Rabbi David Wolpe

Even parents who tell their children that they can ask them about "anything" often change the subject when children ask about God.

And they do ask.

"Who are God's parents?" "If God is so powerful, why doesn't God stop bad things from happening?" "Does God hear my prayers?" The questions are legion. In essence, they are the same questions that parents ask, although in another form. But they are questions we must address. After all, who among us is satisfied to give our children an intellectual, but not a spiritual education?

Our answers to these questions guide our children's view of the universe. What do we wish them to believe, that they are accidents of ancient chemistry or sparks of the divine? Whatever one's philosophy on these matters, we owe our children an honest and searching discussion.

Talking to children about God is a key component of their sense of self. Children are taught that they are important, but why are they important? Ask your children why they matter. I have asked thousands of children "why are you important." The usual answers are "I get good grades, I am good at sports, I have a nice job/boyfriend/girlfriend, my parents love me." All these answers spell trouble, because they are all based on something human, and everything human can change. Are we always going to be the brightest in the class, or have that boyfriend or feel our parents' love? Do you really want your child's self-esteem to be based on your emotional constitution? Is there no unvarying basis for self-worth?

Continue reading. 

How to Raise Mentsches, Not Bullies

The preschool teacher sent a nice note home: My delicious (OK, that’s my word) 2-year-old grandson L. had noticed that his classmate’s nose was running so he got a tissue and started to wipe the kid’s nose before the teacher swooped in with a lesson on hygiene.

L. should have given the lesson on empathy.

You read so much about bullying these days, but the two words I’ve never seen in those articles are “empathy” and “kindness.” And those are really the words that people need to understand, internalize, and teach to prevent and combat bullying.

I’ve seen bullying in the mom who screams when her child accidentally spills a glass of milk. And the dad who yells from the sidelines at Little League when the kid misses the ball. When the teacher smirks at a wrong answer. When a parent laughs derisively at an outfit the child has chosen herself to wear to school. Anything that diminishes, rather than enhances, a child’s sense of self is, to my mind, bullying. And the child learns the lesson—and goes and applies it to someone else, in other situations.
That is not to say that we as parents should not correct mistakes. Of course we should, that’s part of our job. But how we correct a mistake can be constructive or destructive. And how we act and talk to, and about, other people models behavior for our children.

One of my proudest experiences as a mother occurred over 20 years ago when my youngest son, A., was in day camp at the age of 4. The first few days he came home talking about a particular child, C., who seemed to be a little different from the other kids and who the other kids avoided. The day he told me that C. had an accident in the pool and soiled his bathing suit, I realized what was happening.

Continue reading.

The Last Train

Q&A with children’s author Rona Arato on her children's book The Last Train

On April 10, 1945, a train loaded with Hungarian Jews left the Bergen Belsen concentration camp. German officials were attempting to cover up the existence of the Jewish prisoners in anticipation of the arrival of Allied troops. Paul Arato, his brother Oscar, and their mother Lenke were three of the more than 2,000 people crammed onto that train. On April 13, U.S. soldiers discovered the train and liberated those inside.

Ahead of the 68th anniversary of that event, Rona Arato, Paul’s wife, is launching The Last Train (OwlKids), a children’s book based on her husband’s story.

Arato, a former teacher, has published 11 books for children including Ice Cream Town (Fitzhenry & Whiteside) and Working for Freedom: The Story of Josiah Henson (Napoleon & Company). Beginning in 1995, Arato spent four years as an interviewer with the Survivors of the Shoah Visual History Foundation. Established by Steven Spielberg, the foundation records the testimonies of survivors and witnesses of the Holocaust. Arato convinced her husband to be interviewed, and after hearing his story, which he rarely talked about, she thought about writing a book.

The Last Train, which launches Sunday at the Beth Tikvah Synagogue in North York, also shifts forward to when Paul met his liberators at a 2009 symposium organized by New York State high school teacher Matthew Rozell.

Quillblog caught up with Arato to talk about her book.

How long did it take you to write The Last Train?

Probably about three years on and off, I must have gone through at least five drafts.

What went into putting this book together?

I did a lot of research and I read the accounts of the soldiers in the 30th infantry divisions. They were quite detailed, especially of the day of the rescue. Several of them had written their own memoirs, some were online, and others were from oral testimonies. Plus, there were some of the other survivors we met at the symposium Rozell organized. It was one of the most amazing experiences we’ve ever had. And that’s where I learned a lot too. Paul was six at the time of the liberation, some of the others were 15 or 18, so their memories were a lot stronger and they corroborated each other.

Continue reading.