Monday, October 28, 2013

The Jewish Prayer That’s Never Let Me Down

By Rebecca Schorr for Raising Kvell
ShehecheyanuParenting has been compared to many things. I like to compare it to playing darts while wearing a blindfold. Because so often, it really does feel as though it’s just a stab in the dark.

Except when it works.

Some theory you have or some tactic you use works. And then, for one moment, you feel like a freakin’ parenting expert.

Which is exactly how I felt when I overheard the following conversation between my kids Lilly, age 10, and Jacob, age 6.

Jacob: I’ve never gotten hot lunch before. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. So I am going to stand in line with [my friend] Luke. He’s got a lot of experience.

Lilly: Oh, I remember that. Everyone’s scared the first time. After I got my lunch the first time, I said that prayer to myself. Remember, Jacob? The Shehechiyanu?

Oh. My. God. It worked. It really, really worked.

***

As a brand-new mother, I was at a loss when I nursed my son for the first time. I had read (and heard) about how difficult it was and was truly blown away at how my little baby knew what to do. [Flashforward: it turns out that it didn’t come so naturally to either one of us and we would make many trips to the lactation support group for help. But I was completely ignorant of that in the first (hormonal) blush of motherhood.] I felt like God’s creative partner as I birthed and then nourished my son and yearned to express my awe and wonder. I reached back into our tradition and recited these words:

Barukh Atah, Adonai Eloheinu, Melekh haolam shehecheyanu v’kiy’manu v’higianu laz’man hazeh.

Blessed are You, O Eternal our God, for giving us life, for sustaining us, and for enabling us to reach this amazing time.

 Continue reading.



Monday, October 21, 2013

Israel, 'Reproductive Superpower'

By: Mazal Mualem for Al-Monitor Israel Pulse

Reproductive SuperpowerThe chat I was having with the German journalist sitting next to me at dinner naturally got round to Chancellor Angela Merkel’s victory in the elections a week earlier [Sept. 23]. We were a group of Israelis that arrived in Berlin for the annual meeting with our German counterparts over the last days of Sukkot, on a program that began in 2000 to promote Israeli-German leadership.

Once we had said just about everything there was to say about Merkel, my colleague told me about his wife, who was, like him, in her forties. He told me that she has a challenging job, so I asked instinctively, “Who watches your children when you’re both at work?”

“We don’t have any children,” he answered. I was stunned by his response for a moment — not least, in retrospect, because of my tactlessness. I was quick to apologize, but I immediately realized that he wasn’t embarrassed in the least. He and his wife had made a conscious decision not to bring any children into the world.

''We are not the only ones in the family with such an approach,'' he told me, adding that his brother, who is two years older, also decided not to have children. In fact, almost all of his close friends, every one of them well-educated with successful careers, made the same choice. They don’t miss the interaction with children, and his mother has long since given up on him and his brother. She realized that she will never persuade them to make her a grandmother. He and his wife have no regrets or second thoughts about their choice. They have a full, challenging life.

Even the program initiated by Merkel to raise the birthrate, which includes a long paid leave for mothers or fathers and tax rebates for each child, did not cause him to doubt his decision. He has absolutely no qualms about his contribution to the dire prognoses which predict that should this trend continue, the German population would shrink by a third within thirty years, wreaking havoc on the economy.

 Continue reading.


Monday, October 14, 2013

Nosh, Schlep, Schluff: Babyiddish

BabyiddishLearning—and using—Yiddish is fun for the whole family, from the youngest mamaleh to the oldest bubbe and zaideh. Introduced to America as the mother tongue of millions of Jewish immigrants, Yiddish has made its way into everyday English. The sprightly, rhyming text follows a toddler through a busy day and is peppered from beginning to end with Yiddish words. Oy!—will everybody kvell when they hear their little ones spouting words from this most expressive of languages. Here are just a few that are included in this sturdy board book: bissel—little bit; ess—eat; kibitz—joke around, chat; klutz—clumsy one; kvell—burst with pride, gush; kvetchy—dissatisfied, whiny.

Monday, October 7, 2013

Crafting Jewish Tradition for Young Children: Morning Rituals

Reprinted from ReformJudaism.org

Morning RitualsWhen we think of rituals, we think of mothers or grandmothers waving their hands over the Shabbat candles, of an endless Passover seder led each year by the patriarch of the family, or of a bar or bat mitzvah. We rarely think of the everyday rituals that we engage in: the kiss goodnight, watching a special TV show together each Thursday night, or taking turns at dinner each night, talking about our days. Yet each of these are rituals also. They are acts we engage in, at a regular time, that have meaning for us. We look forward to these events and are disappointed when they do not occur. They are not just a physical priority, but an emotional priority in our lives.

Ritual turns the everyday into the sacred. Our tradition speaks of praising God with 100 blessings a day. Really, few of us actually stop 100 times a day to thank God; yet each time we do stop to sanctify time and space by remembering how blessed we are, we are enriched spiritually and emotionally. Praising God connects us to our families, to Judaism, and to the larger world. Our rituals, our sanctifying acts, are idiosyncratic, yet their roots are in the traditions of Judaism. When we share rituals from our childhood or create new rituals for our families, we raise strong children. Research has shown that families who engage in rituals have children who are more resilient as adults. The rituals that we choose to share promote a shared language among members of our household. They tie our children to generations past and generations to come through shared behaviors. Most importantly, rituals enable us to communicate the values we cherish to our children.

Mornings are hectic times in any household, but especially so with children. Families who are successful in getting children out the door in the morning know the importance of routine— doing the same thing, in the same order, each day. Routines work, but they do not address the spiritual and emotional needs we have at all times of the day. Just as you feed your child’s body with breakfast, you must feed your child’s soul with wonder, awe, and blessing. These suggestions are intended to give you a starting place for making your mornings more spiritually fulfilling, more meaningful, and more connected to Judaism.

Upon Waking

Modeh Ani is the traditional prayer to be said by children. Hold your child in a chair or sit on the bed with them, and share a special moment of closeness before the morning rush begins. Recite Modeh Ani together. For young children, sing or recite the blessing in English and in Hebrew. As they get older, encourage them to join you for the English and then later for the Hebrew.

Modeh ani l’fanecha, melech chai v’kayam, shehechezarta bi nishmati b’chemlah; rabah emunatecha.
I give thanks to You, O God, eternal and living Ruler, Who in mercy has returned my soul to me; great is Your faithfulness.

Continue reading.